Brothers & Sisters

Sarah’s daughter, Paige, is a good little instigator of storylines, isn’t she? First, her poolside PTSD made for a family-gathering, secret-exposing pool party, then she got diabetes and earned herself a nice running plot. Now her questions about Hanukkah, Jewishness, and who’s got the power of prayer on their side gets Grandma Nora going for a big Hanukkah party that gathers everyone together yet again and also sets the show apart from all those other Christmas-partying programs. Hard-working girl, that Paige, getting herself lots of scenes while those other little kid actors fade into the distance. Her little brother could have had himself a good ADHD story going by now but no, that slacker, he’s just good for a jumpy scene here and there. The half-brother hardly shows up at all. When Tommy and Julia give birth, that babe better watch its back. Paige is not gonna want to give up that spotlight.

So Paige is asking whether the family is Jewish, and at first it looks like she’s just trying to score eight days of presents, or keep up with the Esters and Leahs at school, but eventually it develops that she thinks her diabetes might go away if she’s saying the right prayers, and maybe Judaism’s where it’s at. What is pretty clear, though, is that she’s looking for a little brush with tradition — something with about the depth of a school holiday pageant — and not a semester at Hebrew school. But Grandma Nora, while protesting that “we’re secular humanists” and that religion isn’t something this family is about, proceeds to go right over the top and down the other side, bringing in rabbis and caterers and historical details to completely bore little Paige to tears. Uncle Saul saves the day by having a nice candle-lighting moment with his niece, and Sarah later explains to her little girl that the diabetes has nothing to do with her being bad or un-religious, and that while it may get easier, it’s not going to go away. What, no prayers for a cure?

Sarah’s got bigger problems than chronic illness to contend with, of course, because she’s busy trying to cheat the woman her father cheated with. Turns out William provided for Holly by making her a one-third owner of the land he bought and the kids now want to sell for millions. Sarah has the bright idea to lie to Holly about the value of the land and pay her off, for no really good reason other than she doesn’t want to give Holly the satisfaction, it seems. Good move, Sarah! Holly wants to think it over, using time the company doesn’t have if it wants to forestall bankruptcy, and when they finally tell the truth, Holly refuses to sell — for no really good reason other than she doesn’t want to give Sarah the satisfaction, it seems. She finally agrees to sell if she can receive some of her pay-off in company stock, thereby becoming part-owner and full-time meddler, I’m guessing. Sarah has no choice but to agree, which doesn’t mean she’s happy or gracious or even particularly smart about it. Honestly, Sarah, don’t you have enough burdens already without toting around that big heavy bag of resentment? Drop it, sweetheart, now.

Nora seems to have dropped hers, anyway. She stops by Holly’s house with some Hanukkah baked goods which aren’t poisoned, as Holly suspects, but come with a side-order of apology. The two women come to an understanding about their mutual importance in William’s life, and call a truce. Which makes exactly one member of the extended Walker clan Holly’s OK with, because she’s already kicked Saul to the curb for going along with Sarah’s ill-fated lie. Will these two crazy kids get back together again? They’d be the only non-marrieds on this show to sustain a relationship beyond an episode or two if they did.

Justin’s relationship with the Army is something Kevin spends most of the episode trying to break up. He first argues that Justin should get three months off to go to a drug treatment program, but the Army lawyer insists that the Army will do its own drug treatment on its own soldiers, thank you very much. Kevin then argues, before a judge, that a contract that does not allow a person to get the medical treatment he or she needs is inhumane, and therefore invalid. Justin’s testimony isn’t a whole lot of help, since he admits that the only place he’s ever been able to be clean is the Army — and so, doesn’t the Army lawyer kind of have a point in insisting he get back there? The judge is sympathetic to Justin and his family’s desire to help him out, but sides with the Army on the matter of law. Lucky thing, then, that there’s a Brigadier General waiting outside with a magic wand to sweep the judge’s decision away and grant Justin three … no, wait, six months! … to drop the drugs before returning to service. And you have to wonder, gee, what favors did Kitty offer this guy to get Justin off the hook?

It looks like Kitty’s last effort to get Justin off the hook, by offering to give a straightforward and not gossip-mongering interview to Rob Lowe’s nanny-loving senator, is going to cost her her job … or not. In fact, her apology for the incident has spurred so much interest that the producer wants to dump Warren and make the show all about her. Does she say “How dare you!” and turn it down on the spot? No. Does she tip off Warren when he nobly offers to quit if she’s fired? No. Does she finally figure out that Rob Lowe’s a pretty big-name guest star and she’d be better off allied to him than to a show with a drunk moderator and a skirt-chasing co-host? Oh, yeah.

Previews for the next episode, which we have to wait until after the first of the year for, shows Kitty getting busy with the senator both professionally and personally, although the latter seems to involve gunplay in some way. Let’s hope he brings those firearms when Kitty brings him home to meet mom, ’cause he’s going to need ‘em.

Memorable lines:

Nora: Religion leads to zealotry. I believe in the ACLU. I don’t believe in religion.

Justin: I have Christmas. I have surfing. I have you guys. … I have surfing.

Sarah: I am thinking of the business. Screwing Holly is merely a perq.

Nora: Bells, whistles, latkes, ornaments, the works. We’ll get a rabbi. We’ll make a video.

Holly: Do you think your dad fell in love with the village idiot?

Original air date: 12/10/06

_{Photo: ABC.com}