Brothers & Sisters

The title of the episode is “Something New,” but you’d have to go all the way through that old-fashioned wedding rhyme to really sum up all the stories that got told this time around.

Something Old

The Walkers take a little stroll down memory lane when an effort to come up with a song for Kitty and Robert’s first dance turns into a trivia game of “What song did you lose your virginity to?” To the horror of her children, Nora remembers that hers was “Pretty Woman,” and that their father had nothing to do with it. She starts talking about her old boyfriend Stan, and the backseat of his car, and their height difference, as all her offspring run screaming from the room.

But although the brothers and the sisters could not be less curious about their mother’s old flame, Nora now is. Proving that the Internet can be just as dangerous for seniors as for kiddies, she Googles the guy, e-mails him, and winds up meeting him for margaritas. Fortunately, he’s harmless enough, an old liberal who never quite got over Nora but doesn’t hold any grudges about the fact that she went and married a Republican when he fled to Canada to avoid the draft. They hit it off, go out a second time, and Nora winds up inviting him to be her date to Kitty’s wedding. Lest we think, though, that this character played by Chevy Chase will be a long-term romantic prospect, Stan points out how much Nora has always needed somebody to fight with, and he’s not the fighting kind.

Also rekindling an old relationship is Kevin, whose new relationship with Jason founders when he finds out that the Reverend Boyfriend has talked to Robert at least twice without returning Kevin’s phone calls even once. So he offers Scotty a spite invite to be his wedding date, luring him with the prospect of fancy food. Later, Scotty brings home some fancy food himself — leftover lobsters from “A Little Mermaid” theme birthday party, and champagne. They apparently fall asleep chastely on the couch, but when they wake up, and Scotty half-heartedly suggests that he should move to his air mattress, things proceed to a point where … well, let’s just say that monogamous thing Kevin was working on? Not so much anymore.

Of course, this is all it takes for the fates to finally deliver that long-sought-after call from the prodigal Jason (I’m imagining Robert called and told him “You better call your damn boyfriend because he’s giving me the third degree”), but it’s too late — Kevin tells the truth, and tells Jason they’re through, and returns home to tell Scotty to stop packing, it’s time to make another go at a real relationship. Choosing something old, and available, and familiar, over something new, and on the other side of the world, and unable to dial a freaking phone.

Something New

But not everybody’s pursuing old romances. Sarah wouldn’t even say she’s pursuing a new one, although you’ve gotta believe that Graham, this new business consultant played by Steven Weber, is going to be taking her out for more than business dinners soon enough. Saul brings him in to the Ojai office to talk about expanding the business. Sarah wants to do that through organic foods, but Graham dismisses that pretty quick and suggests that instead, they start exporting their wares to China. Sarah dismisses that in turn, but Graham and Saul seem pretty big on the idea. Graham takes Sarah out for Chinese food to further extol his strategy, but she’s playing hard to get to both his business suggestions and his personal charm. Still, by the end of dinner, she’s agreed that if he can put together the kind of deal he’s talking up, she’ll go for it, and if he can’t, he’ll go away.

Still not going away is Holly, and it’s actually getting to the point where nobody wishes she would. Talk about something new: This season, Holly has become the mature voice of reason, sounding warnings over office affairs, proferring wise counsel to her daughter, even being accepted at the Walkers’ family intervention. This week, she was suggesting to Lena that, since Tommy’s wife is now back in town, she might want to, like, put on a shirt when she comes to work; and to Rebecca that being a shrinking violet is not good for her health or her ultimate standing in the Walker family, and that she might as well speak up. Good advice, all. Of course, if the old boyfriend to be played by Ken Olin starting in next week’s episode casts any doubt at all on Rebecca’s true paternity, Holly’s going to go back to being the same old Evil Manipulative Witch. But for now, her newfound straightforwardness is kinda nice.

Something Borrowed

For now, the role of “Evil Manipulative Witch” is on loan to Lena, who, ditched by Tommy, is taking up with Justin. First, she invites him out for coffee, and when he explains that he can’t be in a relationship right now, she’s all, oh, sure, just caffeine buddies is fine. But soon enough, they’re at her apartment, joking about what a slob she is, bonding all over the place as two lost youths. She invites him to stay for a movie, and he does the sober responsible thing of saying he’d better be getting home, that’s what his sponsor would want him to do … oh, but, what the heck, he goes ahead and sleeps with her anyway. That Walker Boy Catnip that Lena invested in? That stuff is gold.

Of course, Justin doesn’t know that he’s borrowing his brother’s girlfriend; but Kitty knows that Robert’s been around the wedding block before with another girl, and it’s making her feel a little blue that everything’s old and nothing’s new. Even her dress is borrowed, and as we finally see now the dress that Nora generously passed down to her, it is of an era that is no longer. While dress shopping with two of her attendants, Sarah and a surprised-to-be-asked Rebecca, Kitty spots The Dress of Her Dreams, except that commiting to something new would mean spurning Mom’s offering, and we know how Nora usually responds to that. Surprisingly, though, Nora is so distracted by Stan that she gives Kitty permission to go with the new dress. In fact, Nora borrows the dress right back and instructs a seamstress to completely make it into a new dress for the mother of the bride.

Robert has a surprise in store, too. He’s seemed disinterested by Kitty’s attempts to rope him into dance lessons, probably because he’s a plenty fine dancer already, and she’s a disaster. He’s good with the grand gesture, too, taking Kitty down to the stage at the Hollywood Bowl to have a little dance to the accompaniment of Lyle Lovett. It’s sweet, I guess, and the lines of the song “It may be no big deal to you, but it’s a very big deal to me” are certainly appropriate to the little argument they’ve been having all hour. Still, they’re probably not going to want to make that “their song,” since the rest of the lyrics have to do with cheating lovers, the cheating being no big deal to the cheater, but a very big deal to the one being cheated on. Actually, perhaps Tommy and Julia would like to take a spin to that one.

Something Blue

Despite the return of his wife and his baby, Tommy’s feeling blue — and well he should, because he messed up big time. Julia wants things to go back to normal, but that enormous heavy secret on Tommy’s back is going to make that a little tough. Also tough will be working with Lena when she’s obviously dating somebody else, and making no secret of it at all, Mr. Walker. When he finds out that the somebody else is Justin, the brother that Tommy has never had all that much use for (okay, maybe his sperm, and his child-birthing abilities, but that’s it), there’s going to be trouble. Judging by the previews, we only have to wait a week for it.

Also a little down in the dumps is Rebecca, who for all her cheerful denial still seems to be smarting from Justin’s intervention attacks. She’s happily shocked when Kitty asks her to be a bridesmaid, but defensive as all get-out when shopping with Sarah, who seems to be making cracks about Rebecca’s relationship with Joe even when she’s maybe not. (Or maybe is.) Holly finally gets through to Rebecca that she’s got to go back to being herself — well, no, not the kissing-older-married-men old self, but the outspoken old self for sure. And the girl does rally, finally letting Kitty know that she hates the blue bridesmaids dresses, and Kitty should grab the dress she likes and wear it. Well, okay! It’s a start! Telling the bride you hate your dress may not seem like much, but you look at a lot of weddings and you can see that almost no one has the nerve to do it. You go, Rebecca!

And that’s it for our plot this week.

Wait, what? You watched the previews for this episode, and it was very clear that there would be a wedding?

Where’s the wedding, you say?

Fool! How many times have I told you: Do not believe previews. They will only break your heart.

The wedding is, in fact, next week. I think. Probably. The press release says so. Or at least the start of the wedding. Kitty tells Robert she needs to talk to him, stopping the wedding, so who knows. Maybe they’re going to split up! Also in the previews, Tommy beats up Justin, and Kevin gets arrested! Or something like that. You never know. There’s always something new.

For more recaps of “Something New,” check these sites:

• TV Guide
• Entertainment Weekly
• TV Squad
• Television Without Pity
• AfterElton

and come back here tomorrow for a round-up of memorable lines.

_{Photo: ABC.com}

Brothers and Sisters, ABC, Something New, recap