Brothers & Sisters

As a follow-up to the recap, here are some memorable lines from the episode “Grapes of Wrath.” Did I miss your favorites? Add them in the comments.

Tommy: They’re not teenagers at a kegger. This is our opening. They’ll behave.

Tommy: There’s a lot of things you can say about my family. Bottom line, when it counts, they show up.

Kitty: You’re sending a strawberry shortcake as your proxy?

Sarah: Between work and the disaster that is my marriage, things couldn’t get any worse, except of course if Joe and I were to spend a cozy weekend at a vineyard where everybody knows that he tongued my 20-year-old half-sister.

Kitty: How are you?
Sarah: I’ve been baking, and I never bake, so you tell me.

Sarah: He keeps wanting to talk about it and I just can’t hear it. And it’s not even about the kiss anymore. Things have been said, I don’t know how to go back, I’m too scared to move forward, it’s like we’re stuck in relationship purgatory, which feels more like relationship hell.

Kitty: I am your bearer of all things pastry.

Kitty: I can’t go to D.C. I have a family obligation.
Robert: To deliver a cake. … Okay, maybe I need to be more obvious than lingerie. I am going back to vote in favor of school vouchers, and I will have plenty of time to discuss the other issues of the day, like the little question you popped.

Kitty: My sister’s marriage is falling apart, and I just don’t think this is the time to be flashing some big rock in her face.
Robert: Flashing some big rock in her face!
Kitty: It’s a figure of speech.
Robert: That’s a little presumptuous, don’t you think? Especially considering you’re the one who asked me.
Kitty: Yes I did.
Robert: You asked me to marry you and now you are completely taking it back.

Kitty: I need you to take the cake.
Kevin: Why, because you have a business trip with your boyfriend?
Kitty: Well, yeah, we’ve got some very important issues to deal with, like work issues.
Kevin: Really, is it about global warming? That’s fantas … oh, no, wrong political party. Are you going to resolve the war in Iraq? That’s fan … oh, again, wrong political party. So, honestly, anything short of that isn’t as important as the opening of our brother’s new business.

Justin: I just got out of rehab, I’m not going to a vineyard alone.

Kevin: What’s mom going to do, call a family meeting and force us all to go?

Nora: It’s going to be hard on Tommy, but he’s dealt with disappointment before.
Sarah: Mom, what am I supposed to do with that?

Justin: Alright, look, I’ll go if you guys go, but I’m not showing up alone with mom and a strawberry shortcake. It seems very …
Kevin: You were just about to say gay.
Justin: No, I wasn’t.
Kevin: Yes, you were.
Justin: No, I wasn’t.
Kevin: You’re such a child.

Sarah: I brought you a cake to deliver, Kitty, I didn’t ask you to start a national movement.

Kitty: I have to go to Washington with the senator. It’s really important.
Nora: Kitty, he’s your boyfriend, his name is Bob, and you see him every day.
Kitty: What happened to following our hearts, mother?
Nora: I was referring to Sarah’s heart, not your heart.

Sarah: I can’t sit around watching you run a bed and breakfast for the girl who ruined my marriage.

Joe: He’s your brother, Sarah. It’s one of the most important days of his life. You should be there.
Sarah: Yeah, well, I baked a cake.
Joe: Oh, no, Sarah, that’s what someone in my family would do. But you guys, you actually love each other.

Justin: Wow, Mom, personally, I don’t know if I’d pick this weekend to take a girl up for, you know, like, the weekend.
Nora: What do you mean, the weekend.
Justin: Okay, can we just speak in code, you’re my mother.
Nora: I’m not going to screw the guy, if that’s what you mean.
Justin: Oh my God.
Nora: We’re going to have separate rooms, we’re just up there to get to know each other.
Justin: Very sorry I brought it up, Mom, excuse me.
Nora: How on earth did I ever raise such a prude?
Marc, entering: It’s fabulous out! We’re going to have a great weekend!
Justin: Wouldn’t get your hopes up, bro.

Holly: I am too agitated to even hold a grudge.

Nora: I didn’t realize there was a parental notification law that requires that I report on a twentysomething.

Sarah: What does a girl have to do to get a drink around here?
Tommy: Follow Kevin around.

Kitty: If I take two aspirin, will you call me in the morning?

Sarah: We have children. I know your marriage wasn’t perfect, but I am very glad that you guys stayed together. I had a good childhood. I grew up feeling like I was part of something whole. That’s all I wanted for my kids.

Nora: You have to decide if you can ever trust Joe again, and if you can’t …
Sarah: What if I can?

Holly: So you’re Nora’s writing teacher?
Marc: Professor, actually, but who’s counting?

For a transcript of the awesome Kitty drunk scene, check this Television Without Pity post.

Kevin: You know, you’re supposed to taste it and pour the rest into the spittoon.
Sarah: I know, but that would mean I’d have a good chance of remaining sober, and today that’s not an option.
Kevin: Okay, well, one should never drink alone.
Justin: Sarah, can I talk to you for a second?
Sarah: Not unless you want your head handed to you on a platter.
Kevin: None for him, he’s a friend of Bill’s.
Sarah: He’s no friend of mine.
Justin: Look, will you just listen to me? I’m sorry. I got carried away. I was upset.
Kevin: He was just trying to stand up for you, Sarah.
Sarah: I can stand up for myself, Justin.
Kevin: Not if we keep this pace. None of us will. (They drink) Hey, hey, hey, hey, Justin!
Justin: It’s grape juice, relax.
Sarah: God, that scared me. Fill ‘er up!

Tommy: Holly and I would like to welcome everybody here today. For those of you who haven’t seen my wife, Julia, we’re expecting twins. And the thing about becoming a father, is it makes you think about your own dad. Our father wasn’t perfect. Maybe it came with the territory. I don’t know. Before we were born, he planted an orchard. Just 200 trees. Pretty soon, it turned into this thriving business. We’re naming the new vineyard Walker Landing, because it’s his vision that we’re celebrating today. So, to fathers, to children, and a great new year of wine.

Marc: Very delicate for a cabernet.
Holly: Cabernet blend. We like to mix things up around here.
Saul: Pardon me, actually, I don’t mean to disagree, but I don’t think it’s delicate at all. I think it’s heavy-handed.
Holly: Then why don’t you try the white wine, Saul. You might find it less threatening.
Saul: Red wine doesn’t threaten me, Holly, except when it’s tannic and pushy.
Nora: Saul …
Saul: What? … Perhaps I should rephrase it. I think it’s bad wine. I think it’s immature and inappropriate.
Nora: Funny, I find it a bit overbearing.

Tommy: Where’s Kitty?
Kevin: Forget it, she’s whacked out on painkillers dreaming of her impending nuptials with McCallist …
Justin: What?
Kevin: I didn’t say that
Nora: Impending what?
Kevin: We really should eat, I’m starving.
Justin: Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Kevin: I don’t know why I say these things, it’s like I have Tourette’s.
Nora: There’s going to be a wedding? Oh my gosh. She didn’t tell me there’s going to be a wedding. I’m so excited. There’s going to be a wedding.
Sarah: Oh, that’s just choice, Ma. You are delirious over the fact that Kitty’s going to marry a Republican she’s known for three months, but you’re prepared to write off my husband of ten years. That’s just lovely, that’s so lovely.

Sarah: You guys don’t think I’ve got the strength to handle good news about a sibling?
Kevin: Come on, let’s not generalize, it was just Kitty.
Sarah: Where are the boundaries in this family? Listen, I can live with your good news, but you’re going to have to live with my bad news, or learn to shut up, okay?

Holly: Your family is insane. Why do you think he always wanted to come to my place?

Nora: Why did he always come home to me? Even your own daughter would rather sleep at my house.

Holly: Your only job was to let me know where she was.
Nora: I’d sooner call social services than I’d send her back to you.

Holly: What do you have to show for yourself? Little Miss Pasadena. A box of recipes?

Holly: I can’t believe you did that! This dress is couture!
Nora: I’m sure it’s been stained before.

Holly: You know what I miss most about him? His hair.
Nora: He had great hair.
Holly: I lived apart from him so much. Sometimes I think I’m just waiting for him to sneak away from your house and come see me.
Nora: Holly, I’m going to tell you something you don’t want to hear. You have to let him go. I did.
Holly: Can I say something that you don’t want to hear? You don’t want my daughter living in your house.

Kitty: How was your cake?
Sarah: Oh, it turned out so much better than I expected.

Marc: Nora, I feel really badly.
Nora: Well, I should have known what I was getting into, dating you. A person always tells you exactly who they are from the very first moment you meet them, and when I first met you, you were sleeping with an undergrad.
Marc: Right. I hope that I didn’t ruin your entire weekend.
Nora: Actually, it did turn out to be the weekend, just a very different kind of the.
Marc: What, the weekend we ended things before they really began?
Nora: No, the weekend I learned to trust my instincts.
Marc: Nora, I realize that was a break-up speech, but … how am I going to get home?
Nora: Marc, this isn’t high school. I’ll drive you home. … You can sit in the back.

Investor: You’ve got to be crazy to make good wine. Clearly, you guys are going to do just fine.

_{Photo: ABC.com}

Brothers and Sisters, ABC, Grapes of Wrath, dialog, transcript